Men are really simple creatures. Most of us do not desire much. However, the little we do desire means the world to us. Women often make the mistake of thinking men are really moved by physical appearance (and yes there is some truth to that), but only for a short period of time. Mature men consider beauty a bonus. They truly desire a woman with substance.
Here is what mature men want in a woman:
1. Ability to love him unconditionally – A man likes to know his woman will always be there for him, still loving him… even if he fails her. He likes to know she will be there for him and with him in the good times and the tough times. To learn more read Love is a choice not an emotion.
2. Ability to be his friend – A man loves a woman who can truly be his friend. Many men feel friendship is very important because it creates an environment of sharing, openness, and the ability to truly get to know a woman. To learn more read The one relationship mistake you don’t know you’re making.
3. A woman of God – Many would refer to this as a virtuous woman (a Proverbs 31 woman). This term is tossed around a lot, but men genuinely do love this type of woman. The main thing to admire about this type of woman is she knows she has not arrived and has issues; yet, she is working hard daily to become everything God has for her life.
4. The famous “Ride or Die Woman” – This is the type of woman who is down with her man if he has $2 dollars or $2,000,000. She is very famous, indeed, and men absolutely love this type of woman.
5. An available woman – A man needs a woman who is single and fully available. This means she is living free from any emotional residue from a past relationship. She has healed from hurt and is not seeking to numb pain through a new relationship. She is able to be completely transparent with him, because she has been honest with herself about her past experiences, shortcomings, etc…
6. A woman of high character – Character is truly best represented by the decisions we make and actions we take when no one is around. A man wants a woman with high moral standards; whose actions align with her good intentions. This is the type of woman he is able to trust with his dreams, visions, and goals. This is the type of woman he knows he can grow with.
7. Exercises emotional stability – This doesn’t mean you turn off emotions, but it does mean you are not living on emotion and making emotionally-based decisions. It’s difficult for a man to trust a woman who acts on emotion. Managing emotion is critical. If you are a woman struggling with emotions pick up the book Living Beyond Your Feelings: Controlling Emotions So They Don’t Control You By Joyce Meyer
8. Ability to relax and be playful – Who doesn’t like someone who knows how to have a little fun?
9. An independent woman – Men don’t desire a weaker vessel to control or simply take care of. He wants a woman who can add to what he brings to her life. He especially likes a woman who is independent, but knows how to be interdependent within a relationship.
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Good word
Thank you sir!
“Mature men consider beauty a bonus. They truly desire a woman with substance”…Good post Q!
When you have given a man all of this and they still are not happy, honest and faithful to you, then what? I gave & were all 9 and he even said that it wasn’t me and that I was a great woman, but I am the one who has gotten hurt from this and healing from it as of now.
You have to give to a man who is ready for it or who truly desires a serious commitment. If he doesn’t desire anything real it really doesn’t matter what you do. Some men are just not ready, thus you have to determine those things early on and not enter into relationships based on emotions, etc….Always seek friendship first and allow things to develop in healthy ways…buy the book I suggested and read the other links giving in my article.
THIS GOES BOTH WAYS
This is a message can be utilized by all women as common knowledge, but wisdom aids the women on HOW DEEP to go and WHO deserves that depth from her!!
Itz Showtyme Everything I write toward one sex could go both ways, but I have to pull out certain info I feel men definitely seek in a woman. NO different when I write about what women need…
Sayunda Faye You have to give to a man who is ready for it or who truly desires a serious commitment. If he doesn’t desire anything real it really doesn’t matter what you do. Some men are just not ready, thus you have to determine those things early on and not enter into relationships based on emotions, etc….Always seek friendship first and allow things to develop in healthy ways…buy the book I suggested and read the other links giving in my article.
I like this…
Great read
Quentin McCall You are absolutely correct. We had a great friendship and we as women are emotional creatures which can be something that hinder us in relationships if we lack controlling our emotions. So he couldn’t have been ready but I did learn some things from this and I don’t regret it. I will put the book on my birthday wish list and hope for my family or friends to purchase it for me. 🙂 But I will definitely purchase it. Thanks for responding.
Great article surrounding what a MATURE MAN wants.
VoShonda L Truss Glad you caught the keyword
Why do men want to control from the mid east
Eva Nicole Celestine Thank you Eva
But these are same desires women seek in men. P
Excellent article! Definitely for the “mature man (or woman)” who is truly ready to be in a committed relationship. These are wonderful qualities to both possess & seek. Thanks for sharing!
Do you believe if a man truly loves a woman and puts his had on her one time,and its never happen do you 4 give or walk away.
Run… Don’t walk. If he did it once, he’ll do it again. It’s abuse. And it will only get worse. Best wishes to you, Sis.
Hi Lisa,
I have a favorite saying: “Wait on the crazy”. When you get into a relationship, everyone puts their best foot forward to make an impression…even if that impression isn’t their true self. If you wait and observe, people can’t hide their true selves for long. It comes out in the open no matter how they try to hide it. There are always signs.
Men who hit women usually don’t begin the relationship doing that. They wait until the woman has a false sense of security. Once they start abusing (physically, emotionally or otherwise), they don’t stop without outside help. A man who puts his hands on a woman because he can’t/won’t control himself is NOT ready for a relationship. He’s not a safe person to be with. Even if he isn’t hitting you, emotional, financial and other types of abuse make him unsafe.
You can forgive a man without staying around to get abused again. Let him go the first time he hits you. Staying around is asking for it to happen again. We can’t change anyone and trying to will only lead to devastation.
Good morning! This article is a good read because it provides some great guidelines for women to attain, whether they are getting ready for a man or getting ready for the world! Its tough enough to make it in this world alone and even tougher when you are trying to make a relationship work. Thanks for the guidelines!!!
I like I like!!!
So true man. So true.
Thanks for confirmation,I have truly grown in knowledge as well as wisdom within my six years of singleness!God will always be the best of planners.
Love it! Such wisdom you share with us…..RIDE OR DIE BABY!!! (and those other ones’ too! LOL!) 🙂
Good stuff!
so true!
Quentin you better preach! Life can be so simple, we sometimes make things more complicated than it needs to be.
Great article Quentin!
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How does this work when a woman is all these things and the man tells her he wants to take a submissive position because that is what he is used to? How does a woman create a balance between letting him be the man of the house and family in front of his friends and yet submissive at the same time? This is emotionally and spiritually confusing.
i need this good information so i can better as a woman
LISTEN PEOPLE THIS IS THE ONLY TRUTH> ITS NOTHING WORSER THAN GENDER AND SEXUAL CLICHES. THIS IS CALLED MEDIA AND IT MANIPULATES STUPID PEOPLE. WE ARE JUST HUMAN BEINGS EVERYONE IS DIFFERENT AND NEED THEIR OWN SPECIAL TREATMENT BUT IN THE END. MAN OR A WOMAN WE BOTH WANT THE SAME THINGS. APPRECIATION. CARE. HONESTY. LOYALTY. OUR WISHES TO BE HEARD. WHEN WE GIVE THIS TO OUR PARTNER NO MATHER MALE OR FEMALE YOU WILL HAVE A SUCCESFULL RELATIONSHIP. WE BOTH NEED TO GIVE EQUALLY, NO ONE NEEDS TO START TO GET. WE BOTH HAVE TO ACT RESPECTFUL, BE EQUAL. CARING AND LOYAL, NOT TO GET, BUT WE WANT TO GIVE THIS TO THE ONE WE LOVE. IN A NICE RELATIONSHIP A WOMAN AND A MAN IS BOTH NAKED TO THE TRUTH THAT WE ARE JUST HUMAN BEINGS AND ARE EQUAL, AND THE COUPLE NEEDS TO FIND THEIR OWN SPECIAL WAY TO WORK THINGS OUT, NOT ALL MAN WANTS THE SAME, NOT ALL WOMEN WANTS THE SAME.
I agree! I am an emotional woman that responds emotionally when it comes to relationships. I feel at times I have no control of what I feel inside or how to express it in way of not hurting him. Right now I know I need to heal from my past and really I don’t know where to start. I am angry and bitter. I don’t go to church like I should because I have so much negative energy inside that I don’t want to go to God in that manner because I feel it is disrespect.
I also wanted to say I know what pain feel like but I don’t know what love feel like from man due to my past.
Beautiful write-up.I love it,a must read for every woman