Often people rationalize their singleness with the fact that God is not ready for them to be married or He has not yet sent “the one.” If you are someone who reads my work often, you know I champion the cause of singleness and truly believe it is the season, in which, we prepare for marriage. Thus, it is very important for us to enjoy our singleness and be “the one” we seek to have.
In my article “9 Reasons Singleness is Good for You,” I discussed the beauty of being single and how important it is to be truly single and whole before God. Yet, sometimes Christian Singles find themselves sitting around frustrated while they wait for “the one” for them to just show up and knock on their front door. We typically neglect to see the importance of what I term “intentional dating.” Thus, we never get out and start learning what we like (and even discovering more about ourselves).
Am I suggesting God cannot work miracles and cause “the one” for you just to show up? No, I am not, because He can cause this to happen. However, I think it’s less likely to happen for some of us, because of lack of faith and hearing from God. If God just did things like that all the time, there would be no need to pray and have faith in His promises. God requires us to get up and move! The Bible teaches, “Faith without works is dead.” (James 2:26) So, we need to walk in faith through action. Go move out on faith through action!
We will meet the one God has for us by staying on the road with Him, not the road away from Him. However, there is nothing wrong with being proactive when we are ready for a relationship (8 Signs You Are Ready for a Relationship). All of us who profess God are very proactive in other areas of our life… from going to college in the hopes of securing a job to exercising in order to achieve a better physical body and state of health. God did not create us to sit around asking for handouts. Some singles need to get out and be a little more proactive and intentional in their dating to meet someone. Keep in mind, I am not suggesting being a pick-up artist, but I am saying to mingle a little. Having faith is taking action.
Some people will read this and think it’s wrong or, in some way, sinful. That’s OK, because that is not my intent. We cannot continue to use our faith as an excuse when the truth is we are scared or hurting or uncertain or confused or think we have failed in so many relationships that it is really easier to not deal. So, in order to avoid facing the truth, we use our faith as rationalization.
People use their faith to avoid all the pitfalls of dating, but I am here to help. I can write all the great advice and offer to sale you the best relationship products, but if you don’t put into action what you are learning, then the same mistakes will occur. It’s time we make God proud by walking in faith and not running from fear of things not working. If we approach dating as a friendship and chance to get to know people (and more about ourselves), we will avoid the usual pitfalls, because we have removed the sex, selfishness, and the emotions that usually come from it. Dating is not the problem people are. (Simple Dating Do’s and Don’ts when getting to know someone)
God will help you have your mate, but He will not choose your mate. God has always given us free-will and choice. Seek Him for wisdom and do what He has placed on your heart, but don’t use faith as an excuse for avoiding love.
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