Relationship Coaching: Do you multiply or divide?

Relationships AdviceIn life we seek to be a part of a relationship. However, how often do we seek a relationship to multiply, add to, and enhance the life of another? Often we seek a relationship in order to gain something; however, the problem arises when the gain is for an improper motivation. Improper motivation can be anything from money, sex, business etc. Let’s seek a dissimilar approach to relationships. Keep in mind when I speak of relationships I am taking about all types of “relationships”: from business relationships to friendships.

Some of us begin “the process of being acquainted with” like “seeking a job.” The male or female submits their resume. They go through the resume looking at how much money you make, what can you offer or bring, etc. Then the interview process consists of only asking questions that are designed to locate “red flags.” A somewhat applicable process, but do you know where the quandary occurs in this process?

The quandary occurs when the resume reader fails to reveal anything about themselves. You can’t ask anyone to put their baggage on the table while remaining unwilling to do the same. As I often say, “Always first do or give what you seek from another.” Who are we to think we are above anyone, such as when we subject people to such privation because of our deep rooted past pain or unresolved issues? We always hear some say, “He or she is not for me”, well maybe you were not for them. We have to learn relationships are about “transparency” and walking as someone who is transparent. Transparency is defined whether you are willing to be honest in either in deed and words before you begin the “getting to know process.”

Relationships:  Multiply and Divide

Multiply is defined as to make many or manifold; increase the number, quantity. ” Divide is defined as to separate or part from something else; cut off.” Another definition says, ” to separate in opinion or feeling, cause to disagree.” Before we consider that man, woman, friendship, or job we must consider whether we multiply or divide? Put simply, you must ask yourself, “Will I divide, subtract, or burden the life of this person?” Sadly, some of us don’t consider these things we only consider what we crave materially, emotionally, or physically. We should always ask those questions of ourselves to measure our motivation for wanting the relationship.

Personally before I decide to be in a relationship I ask myself those very questions. It’s very important to me to facilitate a glorious union. I ask myself how I can love her? How can I enhance and add depth to her life? How can I help her goals and purpose in God? What is the goal and purpose for this relationship in God? How can I help inspire her to a deeper level ? How can I help her success to be similar to, or more significant than my own? A wise man once told me, “Every great man has an even greater woman”; thus, I always see the greatness in a woman. Even if God has not called the woman to be my Queen she is great for someone.

Relationships can be a great asset or burden. We should all seek to cultivate positive relationships based on oneness, accord, unity, and team. Let’s all walk together and perform CPR, breathing life into someone by multiplying their life in some way.

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In His Love,

Quentin