The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong- Gandhi
First, I want to thank everyone for the continued love and support. I have received countless messages concerning my blogs along with several questions. I give God the glory for your words, kindness, love, and support. I am happy people are being blessed through my gifts.
In life we all have encountered some form of hurt, pain, or disappointment. Some of us have been run through the mud, deceived, and used. Some of us thought we were loved; yet, found out we were “friend with a benefit.” Some of you were cheated on and your girlfriend slept with your man. Some of you got involved with a 3some and your man/woman liked them better and dropped you. Some of you wanted to swing and it ruined your relationship. Some of you are married and cheating because he/she is cheating. Some of you were molested and find it hard to truly connect with someone.
No matter the degree or level of pain you have to let go, forgive yourself, and forgive the person. Continuing to live in this poison of unforgiveness torments your life. The book of Matthew 18:23-25 teaches us when don’t forgive people you get turned over to the torturer. Meaning in your thoughts you have hate or feelings of bitterness swimming in your mind. When you walk in forgiveness you help yourself. I know for many of you the thought of forgiving someone who has hurt you is hard. You are thinking, “Hey I got all the pain and he/she has moved on!”
In your mind you feel you are in a cage; yet, they have total freedom. You also help the other person when you forgive, because you are releasing them to God. Sometimes you have to “get out of the way”, so God can do his work. You have to trust in God. God will deal with who “truly” hurt us, if we put it in his hands through forgiveness. Forgiving is a seed of obedience to his word. When you forgive you allow God to heal your heart. You live a healthier life free of poison of unforgiveness. The stress of walking in unforgiven hinders your faith and blocks your blessings. How can you ask God to forgive you; yet, you can’t forgive and sow mercy unto another? Unforgiveness nested in your heart will slowly destroy your life. The seed of unforgiveness roots itself in other areas of your life and cause deeper issues. Naturally when something happens to us that hurt it’s just as fresh in our minds as if it has just happened.
You see let’s say you are attending church and the pastor brings forth a good word. Well you feel the word was just for you…….you leave church throw the notes and the bible in the car…………you never even look at them again for the entire week. During the week you think of the word you heard and trying hard to hold it in your heart. By the end of the week the word has left you………..have you ever wondered why? The word left because unforgiveness has your heart hard. You can’t receive the word in your heart when it’s hard….God wants to fellowship with you and love on you…..when you have harden yourself it’s tough.
The book of Matthew 6: 14-15 says, for if you forgive people their trespasses (their reckless and willful sins, leaving them, letting them go and giving up resentment); your heavenly father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive others their trespasses (their reckless and willful sins, leaving them, letting them go and giving up resentment) neither will your father forgive you your trespasses.” (Amp)
How to forgive and let go:
1. Let go and trust God….Lean on God– it’s very difficult to forgive when you are not depending on God. Allow God to have you don’t do your own thing and try to heal without him. The Holy Spirit wants to come in so allow it.
2. Make a choice– Make a choice today you will walk in forgiveness and let go. Chose to obey God and God will heal your wounded heart (Matt 6: 12, 14)
3. Pray– Pray for those who have hurt you and ask forgiveness for people you have hurt.
4. Don’t hurt people because you are hurting
5. Control your emotions – Don’t make emotional decisions that will have long term consequences. For example let me be frank…….Having sex with someone because you lonely, want to be touched, or the person makes you feel loved. Then a baby is conceived off a feeling.
6. Have a passion to walk in forgiveness
7. Don’t have negative outlets to deal with pain (shopping, sex, drinking, drugs, food, women, men, etc)
8. Forgive yourself for past/present pains you have caused others. You can’t pay people back if you have been mistreated God will deal with them.
9. Take down the walls and learn to trust.
10. Seek professional and/or spiritual help if needed.
I pray this has been a blessing. Writing this even allowed me to minister to myself. Unforgiveness is a poison, so wash yourself in the word of God to get clean.
If this blog has been a blessing to you please share with your friends and comment below. Have you joined my exclusive group of thousands who have signed up for my FREE audio series? Sign up today HERE!
In his love, Quentin
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Truly awesome and the absolute truth! Unforgiveness is so draining but forgiveness definitely is a daily process and it’s something you have to work and fight for everyday until u get it right and I’m speaking from experience but once u have truly forgiven you have now set urself free!
yes Katrina you are correct….thank you so much for your comment and kind words
Awesome!
thank u corbitt
Profound indeed. Unforgiveness only hurts the one who refuses to forgive.
Hello Nicole,
Thank you so much…..you are correct
Awesome word, it really challenge me to really forgive a friend who recently betrayed me.
Glory to God…I thank you for your words. Always put Love and forgiveness before carrying around bitterness or anger
I just want to thank you for your words. As a young college student, it’s hard not to get caught up in so many wordly things that my peers are involved in. Reading your blogs, helps me to THINK before I act and I’m thankful. Be blessed bro!
Hello Jonai,
THank you for your kind words. To God be the glory. As you continue to walk in life you will learn things are only as hard as you allow them to be. The more you die to self the easier life tends to become my friend.
I love it! I am printing this out to share with others. I know a few people that can be blessed with this blog.
Thank you so much my friend. We all could forever understand the importance of walking in forgiveness
That’s exactly what I needed to hear! I have to control my emotions and not dwell on what others have done to me and pray for them and myself to heal from any pain!
Britt,
You got it my friend. Holding on to that pain and walking in unforgivness only hurts you more.
Man you are something serious!! It is really good to hear such knowledge and you summed it up so perfect. No sugar coating, but no bashing.. Keep It coming.. I am listening. Be Blessed!!
Hello Tamara,
Thank you so much for the kind words they truly mean a ton. To God be glory for your kindness. I write from real life experience , so what you read I’ve been through personally.
Beautifully written.. and so true!! Thank you for sharing.
Thank you so much Janice..Truly means a lot..to God be the glory..feel free to share with anyone who u feel needs the encouragement
Quentin,
I am so glad that God made us cross paths on Twitter. I was following a whole lot of celebrities who basically had noting substantial to say. When I came across your account, I looked forward to your tweets everyday. Thank you for sharing your knowledge with us! I truly enjoyed the blog. It’s something that i have been struggling with for almost two years now. But with the help of God, I know that I can get through it. Truly inspirational bog.
Thank you so much Sanrizz. That is very high compliment and I give God all the glory for your kindness. I am so happy you are being touched in a powerful way.
I truly love be way God works…I am currently in the process of forgiving and allowing God to heal me. This was such an on time word for me. We hear about the things we’re supposed to do, and we know we know it, but sometimes we need to be reminded. Thank you Man of God for these words not only of instruction but a reminder of Gods Word about forgiveness and His promises.
You are very welcome Janice
Thank you again for another wonderful Blog. This is so true. If you cannot find yourself forgiving others, then how do you expect god or anyone else to forgive you. Holding on to the pain only stops you from growing. It makes you a bitter person and yes like you said, It Blocks Your Blessings. It is very hard to forgive. I am working on forgiving someone that has recently hurt me and it is hard. I just pray on it and ask god to take the anger and bitterness from my heart. I ask that puts forgiveness in my heart.
Joanne
So powerful, I had to share on my FB wall. Blessings! Sun
Hey Sundi,
Thank you so much…
I REALLY NEEDED TO READ THIS.BECAUSE MY MATE CHEATED ON ME.AND I HAVE A HARD TIME FORGIVING HIM.I HAVE BEEN HIDING MY FEELING AND NOT SHOWINGVHIM ANY LOVE.THANK U I REALLY NEEDED TO SEE THIS.KEEP ME IN YOUR PRAYS THANK U GOD BLESS
Hello Denisea you are very welcome….seek your healing….forgiveness will begin your healing.
FINALLY something that breaks down forgiveness in an easy to understand format. Now it’s up to me to take action. Thank God for your message.
you are taking me to another dimension all together
I enjoyed ur blog because it was real. After u forgive someone how do you deal with that person when you have too. And they constantly lie and play games?
With love and forgiveness
Wow!!! Thank you for the simple, bible based word on the NEED and importance of forgiveness. Great perspective that helped me realize that “turning the other cheek” doesn’t mean you are weak, foolish or stupid….it means you trust God to work it out and deal with those who hurt and abuse you! Very empowering!
[…] 6. Lack of forgiveness. See my blog …..Steps to Overcoming Forgiveness […]
Thank you for sharing this wisdom it’s truly divine intervention that I have found you, your work is truly inspiring thank you for reminding me about the importance of forgiveness- could have served me countless years in depression/suppression which clearly and quickly equals lack of expression & 17 years of secrets and lies In an on off relationship struggled to forgive my own behaviour and stop blaming my partners behaviour to lose myself can God truly heal a broken relationship? There are children involved please….
Sorry should have read saved not served me
@Kerene You are very welcome. I applaud you for being mature and accountable for the role you have played in your pain. Most people refuse to acknowledge what you have…Keep striving for growth and guidance…
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